“Embrace reality and deal with it.”
– Ray Dalio
Now and then life has a way of giving you a… well, reality check. I received mine one night in the form of a simple enough question from one of my graduate students. “What makes you so passionate about business?”
I’m almost ashamed to say it, but I gave one of those common, generic responses: “I’m thankful for the opportunities I’ve had and wanted to give back.”
But the question stayed with me. In fact, it was one of those boomerang questions. This question, combined with a recent conversation about building relationships and a blog post I’d read titled “5 Little-Known Factors Could Affect Your Personal Brand” by Heather Husman, hit me like a sledgehammer while I was waiting for the 9:51 train. Why was this?
What the student really wanted to know was my backstory. Everyone has a backstory – where we draw our inspiration from, why we’re passionate about certain things, and how is it that we approach things the way we do. Our backstories shape our core values and drive our ambitions.
As I contemplated this question, I realized that understanding and sharing our backstories is crucial not only in business but in all aspects of life. It’s what connects us, inspires us, and often explains our unique approaches to challenges and opportunities.
Well, here’s mine – the foundation that has shaped my passion for business and my approach to life.
My Backstory
One of my most memorable impressions growing up was sitting on the stoop of my grandfather’s North Philadelphia house eating peanuts while listening to baseball games. It wasn’t the warmth of the fresh roasted peanuts that we had just purchased from a small store on Girard Avenue or the game, but the stories he told about leaving the South or working on the railroad.
These were great stories of adventure and triumph full of colorful characters and plot twists. They were the trials faced by a seventeen-year-old raising up from the hot sandy South Carolina farm fields and coming North led solely by faith. A belief that he was bound, despite any current circumstances, to deliver greatness to the world. It was this undeterred belief that allowed him to endure hard labor, the Great Depression, 3 jobs… 5 kids, and not a penny left to rub at the end of any week; or, having to forgo playing in the Negro Leagues, his lifelong dream.
This is starting to sound like a recipe for disaster. Trials, setbacks, and denials that could easily make one bitter. But not Pop-Pop, there at the front of an 1890s vintage two-bedroom row house he did his magic. Magic that directly produced 7 college degrees, 6 advanced degrees, graduates of institutions such as the University of Pennsylvania, Temple University, Bryn Mawr College, University of Virginia, and Duke University. These weren’t stories of remorse or self-pity but confidence and a sense of greatness beyond self.
Fast-forward almost 10 years after I initially contemplated this question. While reading, Ray Dalio published principles for success in business and life, there it was – the fundamental truths Pop-Pop had taught us were echoed in the philosophies of one of the world’s most successful businessmen.
In particular, Ray Dalio’s life principle number one: “Embrace reality and deal with it.” This was exactly what Pop-Pop had been teaching us through his stories of perseverance and adaptability.
Stop and think about the power of this mindset. Given what Pop-Pop didn’t have educationally and economically when he ventured north, having his family produce the way they have for three generations now, is an extraordinary achievement. If it was one offspring, it could be a fluke or sheer luck, but all?
There was a stronger force at work on that stoop. One that encouraged us to push forward beyond the bounds others might try to saddle us with. He encouraged us to forge our own paths and keep trying. He taught us that when we falter, we should be honest with ourselves, confront reality, and learn from the experience. Work together with others of like mind to move collectively forward even though we might each have unique goals.
So there you have the story that shaped my core, one that took root four decades before I existed and will continue long after I’m gone.
Unfortunately, Pop-Pop didn’t live long enough to see over half of those accomplishments, but I feel that on his last day, he knew he had achieved greatness.
Reflecting on my Pop-Pop’s stories and the principles they instilled in me, I’ve come to understand the true source of my passion for business. It’s not just about success or giving back – it’s about embracing challenges, adapting to reality, and striving for greatness beyond ourselves. These are the values that drive me in my business endeavors and in life.
So now I turn the question back to you: What is your backstory?
Oh, if you want to see my traditional bio this is where it can be found.